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Though this might not be the tagline on most online dating profiles, money matters are a very big deal in relationships. Unfortunately, financial conversations are not the easiest — or sexiest— talks to have with partnerswhich le too many of us to postpone or avoid the topic altogether. So how can we approach this often touchy topic?
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We checked in with experts who broke down for us why finances — and specifically debt — should factor someone your dating decisions before you get too serious with Mr. Because while partnerships mean love, matching slippers and Netflix-and-chill nights, they also mean — in some way or other — combining finances. Even if you keep separate bank s, your finances impact your partner and vice versa.
As Lannan explains, debt is a part of life for almost all of us, and many people will choose to take on debt in order to help reach their life goals. Generally speaking, she says student loans, mortgages and small-business loans can be good forms of debt — as long as they are managed smartly. These include dating cards and car loans for a luxury ride if a simple sedan would do the job.
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According to psychologist Yvonne Thomas, Ph. The trick is to inquire without interrogating, which can sometimes feel like a fine line. Is that kind of thing a part of your life? Thomas says it could also indicate if our date has reasonable debt — like student loans — or frivolous spending habits that make their credit card bills unmanageable.
Think of it this way: Any debt that was accrued before the marriage belongs to the individual. However, any debt taken out during the marriage can make both partners responsible, depending on the circumstances.
Also, if a partner has a terrible credit scoreit could negatively impact your ability to purchase a home or start a company. If you have a lot of debt, you may find it difficult to speak candidly and openly about your situation. Even so, you have to be honest.
Thomas suggests having the conversation in the early stages of dating to avoid misleading your match. If you need help diving in, she suggests a script along the following lines:.
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Right now, I am currently dealing with a lot of debt from college loans and a car payment. However, I am able to pay my loans without having to use credit cards, and I am paying things off on time. So I am managing my debt in a positive way without adding more debt onto my plate. Bottom line?
Communication — and smart money habits — make for a happy union. Shop My Bag. Banking Budgeting Deals Emergency Fund. Compare Savings s.
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